I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize