There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
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