We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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