Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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