So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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