I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
BRING THE BAGELS
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize