I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
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I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
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HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
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