I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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