How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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