he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize