I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize