Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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