There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a naked man in my car right now.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize