Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize