It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize