My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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