I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
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When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
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I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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