Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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