Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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