I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
ttyl tear gas
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize