Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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