I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize