Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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