wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize