So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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