I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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