just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
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