i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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