id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
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