was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
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...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
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I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
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