I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
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Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
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This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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