just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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