But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But theres a keg here and me gusta
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize