ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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