I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize