You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
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