on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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