After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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