bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
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She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
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I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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