I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize