Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize