I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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