Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize