your room smells of hookers.
And success
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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