sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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