Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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