Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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