Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Randomize