you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize