We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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